Have you ever sat down and sorted out your priorities? I mean really sat down and thought about it. I have and it became clear to me that I had my higher priorities set (God, wife, and then kids), but had simply thrown the rest into a stack called other. That led me to wonder how I showed those priorities and where the rest of them fit in. Which was more important, my friends or my job? What would I do if I had to choose between them? It takes some soul searching to really put your finger on it.
Will we really have to make a choice between them? Probably not, but it is an exercise that helped me to figure out my priorities (friends ended up first in that battle). The thing is, when you know your priorities and live by them, it puts things in a new perspective. For instance, I decided long ago, that my family was more important than any job I could ever have. This meant they had first dibs on my time. I did what I had to at work, but I immediately went home when the day ended. This meant that I got passed over for promotion as I was seen as not dedicated enough to spend every waking moment at work. I did make a few other decisions that affected it, but no one wants to help someone advance who goes home as soon as the boss says, "you're on your time now." My family came first. Sure, I could give them a little more money paycheck to paycheck if I got advanced, but the reality, to me, is that my time with them is more important than a little extra cash. How could I justify working an extra 20 hours a week for an extra night out in a restaurant a month? That's what it came down to.
Whether you want to admit it or not, we all look at everything through the filters of our priorities. If your priority is making money, you will look at every thing you do and place a monetary value to it. If it doesn't add money to your pocket and it conflicts with something that does, you will choose the one that makes you money. This is in contrast to someone who's priority is their family that is faced with the same decision where the non money making event is family time and the other is overtime at work, the family guy will choose family. This doesn't mean the family guy never does overtime, he just prioritizes differently. When the family guy works overtime, it is with a specific goal in mind that is usually family centric (a vacation, Christmas gifts, etc).
If you understand your priorities and why you appreciate them so much, it will help you in your future decisions. The downside is that you can talk yourself into a lot of things that are contrary to your priorities if you aren't careful. For instance, you could talk yourself into spending a large sum of money on a new car on the premise that your family deserves it when in reality a used one would work fine, save you money and not stress your checkbook. When you look at your priorities you have to look at them from all sides. I know I have primarily written this on the money side, but that is just because it is the easiest side to see and use. You also have to consider the emotional, spiritual, and moral side of things. Which is more important, working overtime for an expensive vacation or spending that time with the family and then taking a less expensive vacation? That isn't just a question of money, it is a question of connecting with your family. One week a year is not enough time to fully connect with your family. It is a year round thing, at least for me it is.
What is your priority? Is making money more important than helping your child with a science fair project? Is having a night out more important than holding your spouse when they are upset? Is washing your car more important than playing a game with your children? We live our priorities everyday and what you choose is an indicator of that. Don't just say that it is your priority, live it.
Thanks for reading and, as always, have a great day.
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