What do you see?

        As you look out your window (provided you are lucky enough to be near one), what do you see?  More importantly, what do you notice first?  Think about it, what was the first thing you noticed?  Was it the bird in the tree, or the worn out building across the way?  Was it grass on the lawns or the empty parking spaces in the street?  In other words, was it natures beauty or man made things that caught your eye first?  We all see things differently.  That is a fact of life.  Where some See beauty, others see desolation.  Where some see man made junk, others see art waiting to be set free. 
          Take a junkyard, for example.  In it you expect to find rusty, dented cars, stacks of tires, worn out engines, and mud.  What you don't expect is the flowers growing in the corner or the cherry tree blossoming in the middle.  What about the cars themselves?  Can you look at them and see that one of them may have been a thing of beauty when it was new?
         We tend to do the same with people we meet.  We categorize them and sort them by initial appearance.  We don't think that that guy with the purple 12 inch Mohawk is a florist and regularly volunteers at the local soup kitchen.  We don't think that that girl in the nice suit and shoes that is well manicured and beautiful hair is on her last dollars hoping that the interview she is on the way to will get her a job, any job.  It is our first reaction to make assumptions on generalities regardless of the specifics.  We associate purple Mohawks with punk rock and anarchists and thus anyone who has one is one.  We associate well dressed and manicured people with affluence and assume they can afford whatever it is they need.  Yet if we only look a little closer, we can see that the guy with the purple Mohawk is wearing a name tag and apron for the local florist and the lady's shoes show a bit of wear and her purse is held together with clothes pins and mismatched stitching.
         It is in our nature to place people into categories.  We want everything to fit where we want it to fit.  We define our world by what we've seen and heard and we try and cram everything we know into those definitions.  As an example, if I were to set a recliner next to a standard sized moving box (2'x2'x3') and asked you if the recliner would fit in the box, you would, most likely, say no.  But if you break up the recliner into small enough bits, it will fit (trust me, I have experience).  It isn't about Destroying something, it is about changing assumptions.  When I first posed the question, you assumed I wanted the recliner kept whole.  I did not specify it, yet is was assumed.  And you would have been right, a whole recliner will not fit into a standard moving box.  Change your assumptions into questions.
             We make assumptions because we are afraid to ask the questions.  This is because we either are afraid of looking less intelligent, because we are afraid of the response, or just plain arrogance.  The fear of appearing less intelligent is a self centered fear.  You are afraid of what others think of you.  If you ask the question, you find the truth and maybe you weren't the only one with the question.  If you are afraid of the response you get, you are typically making another assumption.  This one about the character of the person you are asking.  You are assuming that the person is going to respond negatively and cruelly.  Once again, if you are polite when you ask, very few people will respond negatively.  The final is the tough one.  It is when you decide you know what the other person wanted.  You know best and thus, you don't need to ask.  They left it up to you, so why should you ask for clarification.
                I guess what this all comes down to is, find the beauty in everything.  Oh, and don't make assumptions.  Oh, and look at specifics.  Wow, looks like I just rambled incoherently for a while.  Makes for an interesting read I guess.
             Thanks for reading and, as always, have a great day.